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gang ah jee
Joined: 14 Jan 2003
Location: city of paper
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 Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2006 6:27 pm Post subject: |
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| adventureman wrote: |
No, actually you've pretty much summed up what anyone could ever possibly need to know about dating in Korea.
Thank you. At long last, life is complete. |
My favourite part was when he got beaten up. |
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Butterfly
Joined: 02 Mar 2003
Location: Kuwait
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| Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2006 6:59 pm Post subject: |
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| justin moffatt wrote: |
Interesting comments on this thread. Sometimes I feel like a support group is needed for dating in Korea. Perhaps this the next best thing . . . .
Anyways, here are my top 5 observations so far (with all their biases) on dating Korean women in Korea.
As with any country, where you meet women can determine the quality of women you find (usually but not always). Now, the club women that I often meet often have these agendas:
1. One night experience with a foreigner (either first time or enjoys the Foreigner �experience�)
.I In my experience, the majority of these women don�t want to see you again (insert comments here on my skills in the bedroom).
2. Free English lessons. Now when I state free I mean free. Often you are led on to believe some form of romance may ensue, although they have no intention to do so. Sometimes (if you are a real chump) you are paying for their meals, drinks, etc.
3. Make their Korean boyfriend jealous. Nothing pisses of Korean men (or most men for that matter) then their woman having a foreigner �friend�. My observation is that many Korean women are pressured to have a �Korean boyfriend� at all times.
4. Free meal or drink. Many of these club women are superplayers. They often have 5 or more Korean and foreigner guys on the go (if they can speak English). You can be lassoed into providing a free meal, which after they quickly exit out for another �appointment�.
5. Visa. Less often agenda, but occasionally some Korean women realize the desolate conditions in remaining permanently here and want out (especially those who have traveled overseas).
Suffice to say, often these women genuinely want a foreigner boyfriend. Sometimes because they are outcasts in their culture either because they are viewed as not being attractive by Korean cultural standards (or they are just not good looking) or they have traveled overseas and have experienced westernized ideologies. |
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| Although I must add that I often see average looking foreigners with stunning Korean women, and wonder: How do they do it? |
See your own observations above, and pity the fools. |
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djsmnc
Joined: 20 Jan 2003
Location: Dave's ESL Cafe
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| Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2006 7:08 pm Post subject: |
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| justin moffatt wrote: |
| Although I must add that I often see average looking foreigners with stunning Korean women, and wonder: How do they do it? |
That's something that transcends cultural boundaries and happens anywhere and everywhere. I think that guys who can't figure that out are usually envious or feel that they are missing out on something.
It's an issue of priorities/reality vs. vanity. A bit of confidence will help you stop wondering about that. |
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Doogie
Joined: 19 Jan 2006
Location: Hwaseong City
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| Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2006 8:30 pm Post subject: |
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| JZer wrote: |
Papa Smurf, good post.
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| So in conclusion, i think Korean girls definately want western guys, it's just that they are not really allowed hahahaha. |
Yes, this is why you must live in Seoul or Busan if you want some action. If you live in a small town, most girls would be afraid to be seen in public with you. There is no way that their parents won't find out. In my town people know my name and I have never even met them.
P.S. In Seoul there are also some nice Japanese girls to chase. |
Actually, some of the most beautiful girls I've seen in Seoul have been Filipino. |
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beebee23
Joined: 20 Jul 2006
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| Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2006 9:18 pm Post subject: good luck. |
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Last edited by beebee23 on Mon Sep 11, 2006 10:00 pm; edited 16 times in total |
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justin moffatt
Joined: 29 Aug 2006
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| Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2006 9:36 pm Post subject: In response to Gan Ja Bee: |
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| In my experience (in any culture for that matter), a boyfriend's jealousy perhaps spurned by their woman's interest in someone else or desperate act to play on her boyfriend's insecurities, may often lead to a physical confrontation. As was pointed out in another thread, there is a sense of risk in certain situations or environments. I am sure most people can expect or accept that. However, if people are informed about the potential risks that may be involved due to differences in cultural norms and acceptable behavior (like having multiple people attack one individual for perpetuating such an act as talking to a jealous boyfriends girlfriend), then that person can make an informed decision to decide if they are willing to risk the consequences to what may seem as a seemingly harmless act. |
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SuperFly
Joined: 09 Jul 2003
Location: In the doghouse
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| Posted: Sun Sep 10, 2006 9:41 pm Post subject: |
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But you could find love. True love.
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Inigo Montoya: [Louder] Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father prepare to die.
Count Rugen: Stop saying that!
Inigo Montoya: [Rugen attacks and Inigo blocks it and then stabs Rugen in the shoulder. Then Rugen swings his sword. Inigo ducks and stabs Rugen in the other shoulder. Then he advances quickly and they fight] Hello! My name is Inigo Montoya! You killed my father prepare to die!
Count Rugen: [Rugen gets his sword knocked away and Inigo slices his cheek] No!
Inigo Montoya: Offer me money
Count Rugen: Yes
Inigo Montoya: Power too promise that!
[he slices Rugen's other cheek]
Count Rugen: All that I have and more. Please.
Inigo Montoya: Offer me everything I ask for.
Inigo Montoya: Anything you want.
Count Rugen: [Rugen attacks but Inigo grabs his arm and stabs Rugen in the stomach]
Inigo Montoya: I want my father back you son of a bitch. |
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JZer
Joined: 13 Jan 2005
Location: South Korea
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| Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:10 am Post subject: |
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| 6) Korea is vey stable economically, so you won't find women beckoning for your "gringo gold card". |
Yes, Korean is economically stable but that does not mean that some women don't want a green card out of here. Some woman are fed up with the Korean lifestyle and don't want to work 80 hours a week for minimal pay. |
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beebee23
Joined: 20 Jul 2006
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| Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:27 am Post subject: True. |
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Last edited by beebee23 on Mon Sep 11, 2006 10:01 pm; edited 2 times in total |
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Guri Guy
Joined: 07 Sep 2003
Location: Bamboo Island
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| Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 1:51 am Post subject: |
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Beebee23, I think you have summed up the subject wonderfully. That is in line with my way of thinking and it is refreshing to hear it from a Korean.
Careful though. Some apologists might not like the reality of your statement.
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| 4) Korean parents are strict and will dis-own any Korean female child who dates outside/non Korean. I'm korean, and I know this for a fact. The father is the hand that rocks the cradle, and his hand will find you! Razz Koreans tend to be very Xenophobic, especially in rural areas, and the further you get from Seoul. Don't forget that most Korean women don't really date outside of their race. It's cultural taboo, but slightly more common in major metropolitan cities. It's a group mentality here, and the society is very hierarchical from its Confucian past. |
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dogbert
Joined: 29 Jan 2003
Location: Killbox 90210
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| Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 2:01 am Post subject: Re: True. |
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| beebee23 wrote: |
Korea is rooted in the group mentality and the family runs strong. Chances are if she wants out and wants to marry a Westerner, her family isn't strong. You're right, you'll find that here in Korea, marrying for a green card. It's like that all around the world. However, a stable, educated Korean woman will not dishonor her family and marry outside for a green card. If she does, her family and name sake probably isn't very strong nor stable.
Frankly I don't even care, but I'm still Korean American, and some of these "me love you long time posts", couldn't be anymore ill conceived and erroneous. Just ignorance and gringo gold cardish crap. Go to the Philipines or Thailand for that kinda stuff.
Disclaimer: Cheers to all; no offense to the poster. Just sharing my thoughts. Everyone else's opinions and posts are just as valid as mine.
Peace out. |
Why is marrying a white person dishonor to a family?
Arrogant bastards.
When white people were conquering the skies, Koreans were trying to cure illness by writing their names in red ink on the soles of their feet. If there's any dishonor, it would be the other way around. |
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stevieg4ever
Joined: 11 Feb 2006
Location: London, England
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| Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 2:42 am Post subject: Re: True. |
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can you explain more about the point below please.
cheers
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Koreans were trying to cure illness by writing their names in red ink on the soles of their feet. |
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dogbert
Joined: 29 Jan 2003
Location: Killbox 90210
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| Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 2:49 am Post subject: Re: True. |
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| stevieg4ever wrote: |
can you explain more about the point below please.
cheers
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Koreans were trying to cure illness by writing their names in red ink on the soles of their feet. |
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My pleasure.
http://www.occidentalism.org/?p=35 |
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bobbyhanlon
Joined: 09 Nov 2003
Location: 서울
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| Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 2:57 am Post subject: |
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| When white people were conquering the skies, Koreans were trying to cure illness by writing their names in red ink on the soles of their feet. If there's any dishonor, it would be the other way around. |
duuuuuuuuuude...... please...
it annoys me too that 'decent' korean girls with 'good' families probably aren't going to go out with me but that kind of sh1te isn't going to get us anywhere. yep, its racist and wrong, but you don't have to respond by being like that too.
sadly though, beebee is completely right. what he said just expresses everything i feel about relationships in korea. in my case i've had a great time here, made a lot of friends, had some good experiences- but i've decided that long-term, i'm not staying. the main reason for this is the constant perception of me as being 'wayguk saram' rather than just plain old me. a part of that is the girl situation, in which i can effortlessly meet girls in bars, or those types that always go for whitey (can be discerned by nasty faux-new york accent, a love of sex and the city and a tendency for saying 'i love itaewon', 'i'm really open-minded' or 'my last 23 boyfriends were canadian, and the one before that was (insert english-speaking nationality here)'.. but i can't seem to meet one really kind, educated, attractive girl who wouldn't mind introducing me to her family. quite sad really...
the weird thing about it for me is that i'd actually like a serious, loving relationship but the fact that i only seem to be able to meet wild girls is making me into the 'playboy' that people always accuse us of being.
anyway i've said far too much, i'd better shut up now.. |
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SPINOZA
Joined: 10 Jun 2005
Location: $eoul
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| Posted: Mon Sep 11, 2006 3:21 am Post subject: |
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| Beebee wrote: |
| 4) Korean parents are strict and will dis-own any Korean female child who dates outside/non Korean. I'm korean, and I know this for a fact. |
I realize you're Korean and know what you're talking about and all that, but I find the above very difficult to believe. Disownment? Dear me.
Dogbert was quite right as well. |
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