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Grimalkin
Joined: 22 May 2005
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 Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 12:51 am Post subject: What has travel taught you? |
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I think I've learned a lot more in my time away from home than in any other period in my life, lessons that range from the profound to the prosaic.
My worldview has very much altered and I've realised that my own particular opinions on anything are less likely to be correct than I had previously believed, consequently I now attach less importance to them. I feel very much less of a need to defend them or to persuade others to accept them.
I think I've also finally learnt to manage my money a lot better
...and (necessity being the mother of invention) I've also learnt to cook using only a microwave, (I wasn't even aware of the possibility of that before).
What have you learnt? |
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Novernae
Joined: 02 Mar 2005
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 6:16 am Post subject: Re: What has travel taught you? |
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| Grimalkin wrote: |
I think I've learned a lot more in my time away from home than in any other period in my life, lessons that range from the profound to the prosaic.
My worldview has very much altered and I've realised that my own particular opinions on anything are less likely to be correct than I had previously believed, consequently I now attach less importance to them. I feel very much less of a need to defend them or to persuade others to accept them.
I think I've also finally learnt to manage my money a lot better
...and (necessity being the mother of invention) I've also learnt to cook using only a microwave, (I wasn't even aware of the possibility of that before).
What have you learnt? |
We seem to have gone in opposite directions.
I've never viewed opinions as correct anyway. My world view has been altered, but I find myself becoming more confident in my opinions now that I have more experience to back them up. I still regard them as opinions that are likely to change as soon as they are no longer supported by the evidence, but I guess I am less likely to shy away from expressing them. The more we learn, the less certainties there are, but that's the difference between opinion and fact.
I've learned to be less stingy with my money. It's only money and arguing over that extra 30cents for a bus ticket will really not matter to me in the end.
I've learned microwaves are really something I can live without and I can't see myself ever owning one again. I used one growing up and, yes, it was convenient for heating up frozen veggies or hot packs, but most places I've gone have not had microwaves. I've learned that gas is the only proper way to cook and it will be worth any added cost to have it installed wherever I settle down.
This post was not meant to be simply contrarian, I just found it interesting that we have learned such opposing things.
Other things I have learned:
Kids are kids, it's the parents who are different.
I have no reason to regret being a socially awkward hermit and I should just spend my time as I like no matter what others may think.I was thinking that was an age realisation, but I think it comes more from the idea that I am anonymous when I'm away from home. People can't keep track of what I do or don't do. Nobody knows me.
I've also been yo-yoed back and forth from actually gaining faith in humans and loosing it again. I've met some really intelligent passionate people along the way that have made me think there is still hope for us, and I've met some absolute dolts, selfish a$$ holes, disgustingly horrid people that make me lose that faith all in the same day.
I was lucky in that I was able to leave home and live in another continent for a year when I was 17. When I went back home, I realised that I was years older than all of my friends. I learned that traveling (not resort hopping) is the most valuable thing anyone can spend their money on, though I know I'm preaching to the converted here. What better way to learn. |
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Woland
Joined: 10 May 2006
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 7:35 am Post subject: |
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I agree with Novernae on most things she has written, though I can easily understand how you came to different conclusions, OP.
One thing that travel has taught me is that people are wonderfully different in their particulars, but share a great deal in general. It has been a rare thing to meet a bad person, one who wouldn't help others, but all the good people I've met have not been cut from the same cloth, but have been individuals.
The biggest thing I've learned, though, is how lucky I am to have the opportunity that travel represents. The places I've been and the people I've met remind me every day that I have opportunities through the accident of being born an American and an English speaker that other people can only dream of. Knowing that portion of the foundation of my life is luck I hope has led me to more humility and empathy in my relationships with others. If that is the case, then I think I can say that travel has made me a better person. |
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Novernae
Joined: 02 Mar 2005
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 7:59 am Post subject: |
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| Woland wrote: |
I agree with Novernae on most things she has written, though I can easily understand how you came to different conclusions, OP.
One thing that travel has taught me is that people are wonderfully different in their particulars, but share a great deal in general. It has been a rare thing to meet a bad person, one who wouldn't help others, but all the good people I've met have not been cut from the same cloth, but have been individuals.
The biggest thing I've learned, though, is how lucky I am to have the opportunity that travel represents. The places I've been and the people I've met remind me every day that I have opportunities through the accident of being born an American and an English speaker that other people can only dream of. Knowing that portion of the foundation of my life is luck I hope has led me to more humility and empathy in my relationships with others. If that is the case, then I think I can say that travel has made me a better person. |
I especially agree with your last point. My best friend in Argentina had never left her province. I remember bringing her with me to Bolivia to do a visa run, and her not realising that she had to have her documents with her. Then, on the bus home, our bus was stopped by the illegal goods cops. The only reason she wasn't sent to Bolivia was because being with whitey here had enough influence to get her out of it. That was an incredible realisation; my first real experience of 'reverse' racism.
One thing I neglected to mention was the acceptance I have gained for loosing touch. It still pains me to think of some of the friends I haven't spoken to in years, some of which I have no hope of ever encountering again. When I have those regrets I think of a conversation I had with one of the most influential people in my life (who I've since lost touch with). We talked of the importance of those who come and go in our lives, those who are there for such a short time, but who teach us what we need to know in that time. Whether they stay in our lives or not, they have still changed us and in a way given us a part of them. As corny as this sounds, a part of them is always there. |
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jajdude
Joined: 18 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:36 am Post subject: |
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Ah, a good thread with some real thoughts. Spending time in a foreign country has shown me more deeply than before, when it was just more of a theory to me, how heavily shaped we are by our cultures. Without travelling outside one's home culture, you can still grasp this idea, and say, yeah, it's obvious, but it hits home harder when you see it in another culture. It's kind of like saying hitting a 90 mph fastball looks hard vs actually standing at the plate against Roger Clemens and not even seeing the ball whizz past you.
It's really quite something. Wherever you go, you can see it now that you've been really awakened to the fact. Before, things were just normal. You couldn't see your own culture well as part of it. You step into another one and feel your own more, as well as the other. You encounter the thought patterns that others have been given, and also become aware of the ones you've been given. You see what your attachments are, and you can see them in others, more than you would have had you never got on that plane.
You also see that everyone is the same in this way. The differences appear superficial after a while knowing we are all clouded with culture of some sort. Sometimes you are amazed we argue so much, and give such importance to our own little conditionings. |
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merlot
Joined: 04 Nov 2005
Location: I tried to contain myself but I escaped.
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:51 am Post subject: |
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I've learned that that living expenses in the US have become totally out of control, that Korea (although a wonderful experience) is the closest thing possible to actually living on another planet.
Finally, I've found that living in Central America (Costa Rica) and working for US dollars in a lucrative field (coastline property sales) is a dream job wrapped around a paradisiacal existence where the weather is perfect, the women are beautiful and ultra-friendly and where a single man (or woman) can obtain his or hers own personal seventh heaven.
Pura Vida! |
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Grimalkin
Joined: 22 May 2005
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 12:51 pm Post subject: |
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Novernae
| Quote: |
This post was not meant to be simply contrarian, I just found it interesting that we have learned such opposing things.
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I too find it interesting and I'm glad you posted it.
I hope I haven't actually become stingy but I think I have learned to become more disciplined in the way I spend. I have Koreans to thank for that. At home people tended to be amused by the way I spent money so freely. Here the shocked reaction I sometimes got made me think more about what I was doing.
One example is the way that I would take a taxi everywhere here when I came first because I thought they were so cheap compared to home. In the mornings on my way to work I had a ten minute walk to the bus stop. I rarely took that bus. About a minute or two into my walk a taxi would usually come along and I would hail it. Telling my students about it they were horrified that I was spending 5,000 won in a taxi for a trip that would have cost 700 won in a bus. There are other examples too numerous to relate. In the end I started to feel guilty every time I wasted money...I could almost see my students disapproving faces before me.
While I do have gas I only have two rings and so certain things (banana bread for one) would be impossible to make without a microwave. I've had a lot of fun using the microwave to cook with recipes I've got thro' the internet. There's a fun factor to it akin to improvising while camping. 
I think on the whole I've been quite lucky with the people I've met here, with two notable exceptions. But even those I can write off as the cost of a valuable learning experience. |
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Grimalkin
Joined: 22 May 2005
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 12:58 pm Post subject: |
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| Woland wrote: |
One thing that travel has taught me is that people are wonderfully different in their particulars, but share a great deal in general.
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I like the way you've expressed that.
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| The biggest thing I've learned, though, is how lucky I am to have the opportunity that travel represents. The places I've been and the people I've met remind me every day that I have opportunities through the accident of being born an American and an English speaker that other people can only dream of. |
I often have a similar realisation. We are lucky! |
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Grimalkin
Joined: 22 May 2005
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 1:02 pm Post subject: |
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| jajdude wrote: |
Ah, a good thread with some real thoughts. Spending time in a foreign country has shown me more deeply than before, when it was just more of a theory to me, how heavily shaped we are by our cultures. Without travelling outside one's home culture, you can still grasp this idea, and say, yeah, it's obvious, but it hits home harder when you see it in another culture. It's kind of like saying hitting a 90 mph fastball looks hard vs actually standing at the plate against Roger Clemens and not even seeing the ball whizz past you.
It's really quite something. Wherever you go, you can see it now that you've been really awakened to the fact. Before, things were just normal. You couldn't see your own culture well as part of it. You step into another one and feel your own more, as well as the other. You encounter the thought patterns that others have been given, and also become aware of the ones you've been given. You see what your attachments are, and you can see them in others, more than you would have had you never got on that plane.
You also see that everyone is the same in this way. The differences appear superficial after a while knowing we are all clouded with culture of some sort. Sometimes you are amazed we argue so much, and give such importance to our own little conditionings. |
This is so true! I sometimes think I've had almost as many insights into my own culture from living in Korea as I have had into Korean culture. |
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Grimalkin
Joined: 22 May 2005
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 1:05 pm Post subject: |
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| merlot wrote: |
I've learned that that living expenses in the US have become totally out of control, that Korea (although a wonderful experience) is the closest thing possible to actually living on another planet.
Finally, I've found that living in Central America (Costa Rica) and working for US dollars in a lucrative field (coastline property sales) is a dream job wrapped around a paradisiacal existence where the weather is perfect, the women are beautiful and ultra-friendly and where a single man (or woman) can obtain his or hers own personal seventh heaven.
Pura Vida! |
Wow!.....pm me if you ever have a vacancy at work! |
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mnhnhyouh
Joined: 21 Nov 2006
Location: The Middle Kingdom
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 2:16 pm Post subject: |
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| Novernae wrote: |
One thing I neglected to mention was the acceptance I have gained for loosing touch. It still pains me to think of some of the friends I haven't spoken to in years, some of which I have no hope of ever encountering again. When I have those regrets I think of a conversation I had with one of the most influential people in my life (who I've since lost touch with). We talked of the importance of those who come and go in our lives, those who are there for such a short time, but who teach us what we need to know in that time. Whether they stay in our lives or not, they have still changed us and in a way given us a part of them. As corny as this sounds, a part of them is always there. |
I grew up in a nomadic family and I too have lost touch with many who played central roles in my live. I guess I was still fairly young when I came to accept that life was like that.
I am now in my 34th house, and about to move on again in two weeks, and might not be back in my home country for some time.
For the last 5 - 10 years I have spent more effort keeping in touch with those central people. I try to visit them when possible, even though they may be a considerable distance from my present home. However email can make visiting easier as I am able to stay current with the major events in their lives. Then, when visiting, we can more quickly move past the mundane catching up and nostalgia, and start having the sort of conversations that were the reason for our being close in the first place.
I quote the sunscreen email....
| Sunscreen email wrote: |
Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were
young.
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crazylemongirl
Joined: 23 Mar 2003
Location: almost there...
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 6:00 pm Post subject: |
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1. That I'm so lucky to be born white, and from a developed country. I have the freedom to cross borders with ease and find work in a number of countries. I can study in 3 countries at as a domestic student. I can go to most places in the world and safely assume that someone there will speak my mother tongue because I don't speak the local language.
2. With relationships - friendship or otherwise - it's amazing how much time and situation lulls you into a false sense of intimacy and after a while you start to realize how transient most people in your life really are. So many relationships, friendships or otherwise, are based so much upon common everyday situations; age, occupation and location. But you find that once that commonality is removed, you aren't left with much else and these people quickly disappear from your life once they've cleared customs. So you learn to be careful with who you invest yourself with.
3. Being removed from your own culture allows you to see past the boring common elements of friendships and allows you to make interesting connections with people you probably wouldn't have if you were living in your home country.
4. Travel allows you to be liberated and humbled at the same time. You are free from the constraints that your own culture puts on you which allows you to be more of your true self than the one you put on display for others 'back home.' But at the same time you find yourself having to ask for help about the most basic of survival needs which infantilises you as well.
Last edited by crazylemongirl on Sat Dec 09, 2006 7:31 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Grimalkin
Joined: 22 May 2005
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 6:48 pm Post subject: |
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| crazylemongirl wrote: |
| 1. That I'm so lucky to be born young |
I suspect this may not have been entirely a matter of luck...lol
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2. With relationships - friendship or otherwise - it's amazing how much time and situation lulls you into a false sense of intimacy and after a while you start to realize how transient most people in your life really are. So many relationships, friendships or otherwise, are based so much upon common everyday situations; age, occupation and location. But you find that once that commonality is removed, you aren't left with much else and these people quickly disappear from your life once they've cleared customs. |
I often find myself wondering about this. Which among the friendships that I am forming here will pass the test of time. that
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| 3. Being removed from your own culture allows you to see past the boring common elements of friendships and allows you to make interesting connections with people you probably wouldn't have if you were living in your home country. |
This for me is one of the most exciting aspects of the experience!
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| 4. Travel allows you to be liberated and humbled at the same time. You are free from the constraints that your own culture puts on you which allows you to be more of your true self than the one you put on display for others 'back home.' But at the same time you find yourself having to ask for help about the most basic of survival needs which infantilises you as well. |
Interesting, that aspect of it had never struck me before. |
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kimchi story
Joined: 23 Nov 2006
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 8:39 pm Post subject: |
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It's good to hear other people talk about how they deal with people coming and going in their lives. Sometimes I feel like it must be what beating an addiction is like: I think about the people who I can't find right now and miss them. I get hit pretty hard when it comes to saying goodbye.
My first stint in Seoul, in 2001-2, was at an ECC and I taught lots of extras. I didn't have the motivation to pick up hangul at all. That experience taught me what it's like to be illiterate. In Canada I'm a high school English teacher, so literacy is something I think about constantly - but to live with illiteracy changed my thinking in ways I don't fully understand yet. Comprehensibility (as in the ability to express ideas) has actively become my priority and grammar is merely an entertaining distraction along the way. |
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twg
Joined: 02 Nov 2006
Location: Getting some fresh air...
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| Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 10:47 pm Post subject: |
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This may be a cliche, but~
Don't drink the water. |
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