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duhweecher
Joined: 06 Nov 2013
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2014 11:32 pm Post subject: Negative Energy |
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Anyone else pick up on the amazing level of pent up NEGATIVE ENERGY people seem to have here? (Yep, sounds like yoga material here..."negative energy"...no, I can't even define it really, but I think you know what I mean) Where is this stemming from? Is it sort of a conflict-oriented mentality or something?
I mean, today, for example, I went to a wine store where I usually purchase my Merlot. The owner is usually quite nice and friendly. Today, one of his acquaintances was there apparently paying a visit. The owner wasn't his usual happy self (understandable; I've read enough about emotional labour and really don't feel like he always has to be nice). But I was shocked that he actually said, "Oh, you were just here recently" in a mumbled voice but loud enough for his friend to hear.
I said, I haven't been here for nearly two months, with a laugh. No reply. In fact, he wouldn't even look me in the face and just ignored my reply with a smug little yeah-right look on his face. The whole situation had a really negative vibe to it.
This is just a small case of what I mean, but I think this sort of negativity is at a level that is by far on a more social level in Seoul (to say the least) than any other place I have ever been or lived. What's going on with people here? Is it really chic to be a jerk, rude, or simply negative about any and everything? To make even the most sterile (or even positive) of situations into a negative one?
I usually like pretty much everything in Korea (...I am Korean....American), but this negativity is really starting to get to me and I don't think it's just a personal problem.
Anyone else pick up on this feeling? |
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greene
Joined: 11 Dec 2008
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 12:38 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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i used to have a friend in korea. when we would walk down the street he would be getting hit by ajumas and ajushis left and right on the shoulder. taxi drivers would pull over the car to yell at him (i saw this in one of the few times i rode with him but he told me it happened often). he absolutely loathed korea
however i've hardly ever been barged into. and taxi drivers are very nice to me almost all the time
yesterday i was in a particularly bad mood. very very negative. an ajushi pushed me because i accidentally stepped on his foot. i apologized and then realized i was being negative at that time and i attracted negativity
i really think like attracts like. for instance, you were treated negatively and now you are complaining about it on a message board looking for others to validate the existence of this negativity
it exist but you can basically live without seeing it if you are positive yourself. the negativity just goes away
</new age speak> |
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duhweecher
Joined: 06 Nov 2013
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 1:01 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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greene wrote: |
i used to have a friend in korea. when we would walk down the street he would be getting hit by ajumas and ajushis left and right on the shoulder. taxi drivers would pull over the car to yell at him (i saw this in one of the few times i rode with him but he told me it happened often). he absolutely loathed korea
however i've hardly ever been barged into. and taxi drivers are very nice to me almost all the time
yesterday i was in a particularly bad mood. very very negative. an ajushi pushed me because i accidentally stepped on his foot. i apologized and then realized i was being negative at that time and i attracted negativity
i really think like attracts like. for instance, you were treated negatively and now you are complaining about it on a message board looking for others to validate the existence of this negativity
it exist but you can basically live without seeing it if you are positive yourself. the negativity just goes away
</new age speak> |
I'd say it's a bit of a leap to say I'm complaining about it on the message board. First, I'm asking a question. Second, I'm talking about the energy and vibes that many people feel when dealing with Korean natives. I mean I'm Korean, fluent in the language, and pretty optimistic. However, there are seriously a lot of angry natives or negative people in Seoul. I honestly think it may be a Seoul thing (not exactly sure).
I'll repeat, but perhaps it wasn't clear: I'm actually asking a question not complaining. I've already discovered that people are incredibly negative here...that's not something that needs to be negotiated. It's even something that my Korean friends already admit. But, as you can imagine, it's hard for people to explain their own ways of acting and feeling--often it's easier to some extent for people to be psychoanalysed by others rather than by themselves (cf. Tocqueville's On Democracy). That said, I thought (and think) that perhaps some non-Koreans sojourning here would have an idea.
I mean, gosh, it seems that non-Koreans always have an opinion about Koreans. It's a bit shocking that when given or even asked to give an opinion on a truly perceived problem as such that they would be so quiet.
For several reasons, I'm assuming you're Korean like me, so I guess well, we may still be in the same boat (to a degree) in terms of answering this question. Like you said, and I fully agree, it is possible to be so optimistic that you just don't notice the negativity, but that doesn't mean it's not there. I mean I guess I'm in the "yes, the darn tree fell even if you're not there to see or hear it" camp.
Simply put, I think it delusional and overwhelmingly self-centred to assume that the way people treat us or others amounts to how we feel inside. |
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KimchiNinja

Joined: 01 May 2012 Location: Gangnam
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 1:35 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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duhweecher wrote: |
Anyone else pick up on this feeling? |
Nope, I find Koreans to be really upbeat energetic positive fun polite people. |
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atwood
Joined: 26 Dec 2009
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Sector7G
Joined: 24 May 2008
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 4:26 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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duhweecher wrote: |
I mean, today, for example, I went to a wine store where I usually purchase my Merlot. The owner is usually quite nice and friendly. Today, one of his acquaintances was there apparently paying a visit. The owner wasn't his usual happy self (understandable; I've read enough about emotional labour and really don't feel like he always has to be nice). But I was shocked that he actually said, "Oh, you were just here recently" in a mumbled voice but loud enough for his friend to hear.
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I am not saying that I disagree with you.....necessarily, though I am leaning toward it. However, your example does not really help make your point at all. A guy who is "usually quite nice and friendly" is a little less so on one occasion. So? He may have had a bad day, or maybe he was putting on a front because his friend was there.
By the way, I had never heard the term " emotional labour" before, but I instantly related to it. The types of jobs and relationships(think in-laws) that require it actually drain me more than hard manual labor does. |
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Stain
Joined: 08 Jan 2014
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 5:06 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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KimchiNinja wrote: |
duhweecher wrote: |
Anyone else pick up on this feeling? |
Nope, I find Koreans to be really upbeat energetic positive fun polite people. |
There's no need to get sarcastic. |
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Sector7G
Joined: 24 May 2008
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 5:11 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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Stain wrote: |
KimchiNinja wrote: |
duhweecher wrote: |
Anyone else pick up on this feeling? |
Nope, I find Koreans to be really upbeat energetic positive fun polite people. |
There's no need to get sarcastic. |
Yes, Dave's is not the place for negative energy! |
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Stain
Joined: 08 Jan 2014
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 5:29 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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Sector7G wrote: |
Stain wrote: |
KimchiNinja wrote: |
duhweecher wrote: |
Anyone else pick up on this feeling? |
Nope, I find Koreans to be really upbeat energetic positive fun polite people. |
There's no need to get sarcastic. |
Yes, Dave's is not the place for negative energy! |
Exactly, Sector7G, the OP was just asking a question and gets slammed with cold-blooded sarcasm. |
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Sector7G
Joined: 24 May 2008
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 5:42 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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Stain wrote: |
Exactly, Sector7G, the OP was just asking a question and gets slammed with cold-blooded sarcasm. |
Which is the worst kind!!
Seriously, I just think there is a wee bit of irony in a thread on Dave's about negative energy in Korea. |
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Stain
Joined: 08 Jan 2014
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 6:10 am Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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Sector7G wrote: |
Stain wrote: |
Exactly, Sector7G, the OP was just asking a question and gets slammed with cold-blooded sarcasm. |
Which is the worst kind!!
Seriously, I just think there is a wee bit of irony in a thread on Dave's about negative energy in Korea. |
Ok, while I agree that might be true, I just have a problem with posters who feel the need to play with posters that they actually agree with. Why do they not just relate or share experiences, considering we are all in the same boat over here? |
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Died By Bear

Joined: 13 Jul 2010 Location: On the big lake they call Gitche Gumee
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 11:15 am Post subject: |
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OP your thread is too negative. Brighten it up a little, or else. (I have pull with the mods). |
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happiness
Joined: 04 Sep 2010
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 5:55 pm Post subject: |
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OK, I think about this alot and I have had my ups and downs like anyone here, but I will say that it really is the energy you put out PLUS the amount of dont fuQ with me. I have had so many times people who were happy to see me one day and then snide the next. I had it once this week!
I knew a guy who had lived the same amount of times as I have here and when we compared stories it was really different. Id say in 14 years, I never have really been messed with here, but he had been fuqd with all "up and down." Id made me think, wha was the difference.
One difference is I think alot of Koreans focus on their "gibun" and it can depend on their situation, relation to others, blah blah. I have nearly never heard anyone say lets be happy because we are alive, healthy, blah, blah.
Arent the locals said to be the or nearly the most unhappy people in the world?
Then why would we expect them to have good energy.
I have good energy, and if someone doesnt, that doesnt mean much to me.
Too much Beta, not enough Alpha I think.
When I worked teaching business people in Gangnam, Id hear all the time "Happiness, I envy you, but you have so many hobbies and interests, I have none."
At first, I felt bad for them, but not now, they have to find their own happiness, and thats EVERYONE in the world. If they dont, its not my fault.
I showed them, I encouraged them.
But if someone is unhappy, you CANT change it, they have to change it.
You can offer a smile or whatnot, but is it important for you to do it?
But for living here, one does have to have a thicker skin, and a bit of solid "Nunchi"
Most of the friends and thegirls I dated have said they liked my energy I put out.
Im not happy and friendly to everyone, but I do have a bit of the Im doing great, but beyond that If someone if miserable or unhappy, they get one chance from me and then I go above and beyond.
You know? |
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le-paul

Joined: 07 Apr 2009 Location: dans la chambre
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 6:14 pm Post subject: |
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Its old hat why people get annoyed etc. (and its been talked to death on here), but I will say this, Koreans on the whole really do not seem to get enough sleep.
My kneigbours are banging around long after I go to bed and before I get up. If they are anything to go by, Id reckon most keople get between 4-6 hours a night sleep. As well as not eating a substantial kreakfast before kwork/skool, the traffik etc., it would be enough to make anyone krouchy all morning.
Btw, i thought you were referring to daves having a negative energy - that would be an eye opening topic... |
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greene
Joined: 11 Dec 2008
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2014 6:34 pm Post subject: Re: Negative Energy |
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duhweecher wrote: |
For several reasons, I'm assuming you're Korean |
화이트 보이 야 |
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