Korean Job Discussion Forums

[McNasty]

This is a great reply in regards to families that send their kids abroad with the mother accompanying.
http://joongangdaily.joins.com/200502/22/200502222241548639900090109013.html

I always here about the poor lonely father that is so desperate that he ends up finding comfort in the arms of another woman. It's one thing to feel lonely, but it's sad to think and believe that the only option is to cheat on your wife. If they can't remain faithful why send them in the first place, perhaps the entire family should go together.

The real question isn't who is to blame for the infidelity, it's why the hell do they send them overseas in the firstplace?

I am aware of the usual reply of, 'they are desperate for their children to succeed', but if that's the case, doesn't that suggest that the problems originate from within the country?
It seems to me that they are running away from the real problem that everyone seems aware of but unwilling or incapable of solving the problem.

[lastat06513]

Thats the sad part of korean mentality~ Parents firmly believe that if their children get a good foreign education, they would be able to get into one of the top schools here in Korea. So, the mother usually goes to take care of the children and the father stays to work here to support them there because most of the time, their top-notch Korean education isn't worth spit in the western job market. Or they stay long enough so the children can learn English so they can get an edge on the narrow job market here.

These days, Korea is pondering whether to open foreign-run schools in places like Cheju or Inchon. But the "ever-enlightening" URI party is up in arms because they don't want the schools to take the funds they earn in Korea out of the country and they said it would place other public schools in much unwanted competition to improve

What do people think about that?

[Yaya]

Going to an overseas school is the LAST option for a native Korean to pursue if he or she wants to live in Korea. You need to build up a good alumni network in high school and college, and going abroad for school during that crucial time ain't gonna do it.

[Pyongshin Sangja]

KLJH

[McNasty]

[casey's moon]

What I wonder is... what's the point of all this education worry anyway? You go through all sorts of pains to give your children the best education possible, including jeopardising your marriage and your happiness... for what???? So that your kids can grow up, become successful people, have kids and then go through all sorts of pains to give their children the best education possible? Where is the happy ending in all this? Living in the present even just a tiny bit doesn't seem to occur to many people in this country. I have to remind my husband to enjoy the NOW sometimes and stop worrying about the future. The future might never come, but NOW is definitely a reality.

[dogbert]

[McNasty]

[Yaya]

[Gollum]

[chiaa]

[Drakoi]

[nrvs]

My mother sent me a long, bittersweet article from the Washington Post about the �ⷯ�� phenomenon a couple weeks ago. Unfortunately, it's from mid-January and under the Post's archive "subscription" service now, so I can't link it.

The article was a case study of a Korean family who split up to further their three children's education in America. The mother was a middle-aged lady who studied in America herself (at UNLV). The husband, an executive at Korea's largest casino, met his wife while obtaining his Bachelor's at the same university. (I must mention here that the husband sought higher education in America because he did poorly on the entrance exam for Korean university. He wouldn't have attended a good one. Funny how he's in a high-paid management position in Korea now, huh?) Their children were a 13 year-old girl, an 11 year-old boy, and a 3 year-old girl. They settled in an outer northern suburb of Washington, DC with good public schools.

Hannah, the 13 year-old, loved the American educational system. She had excelled in her ESL class to the point she was only attending once a week as opposed to every day. I think one quote from her was that her year in American public schools was the "best year of [her] life." The boy, on the other hand, was clearly unhappy. He loved math ("except the word problems"), but he held onto his Korean identity by resisting English acquisition. The article explained that he wasn't a great student in Korea either, but there was no reason why he should be having so much trouble with English after a year. His parents said that he wanted to retain a linguistic connection with his homeland, and his absent father by extension. And, like a typical 3 year-old, the little girl was already picking up on English from TV cartoons. The family was clear that they had no plans to live in Korea again. Perhaps the children might feel differently later on, like many kyopos do now, but they'd have to learn Korean all over again.

Anyway, husband and wife were clearly devoted to each other. Korean male stereotypes aside, I doubt there was any infidelity going on between these two. Husband was 10 years from an early retirement from casino management at age 49. He mentioned that if he was younger or in not such a secure financial position he'd already be operating a small business in the United States with his wife. It was obvious that he was profoundly unhappy with being away from his family. He said that his only diversion from work was golf (at the casino golf course) and church several times a week. In the United States, the other half of the family goes to a Korean Christian (I think it was Methodist) church. The article quoted the pastor saying that he has many such families in his community. He that some husbands -- former professionals in Korea -- had broken down from the stress of separation. They were presently illegal in the United States, working in restaurants. On expired tourist visas. "Unheard of until now" was his quote. Nevermind the loss of face washing dishes at the Korean BBQ -- if these guys get caught they would be unable to secure another American visa for a long time.

Korean families feel so strongly about the shortcomings of the Korean educational system that they are taking such extreme measures. It's absolutely ridiculous.

How many middle-class families is the ROK going to bleed before real, drastic change is seen in Korean education?

[casey's moon]