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Korean Job Discussion Forums "The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
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jessie-b

Joined: 17 Apr 2006
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Posted: Wed Jan 24, 2007 6:20 pm Post subject: Dating Korean Men |
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Do any of the ladies have any positive or negative stories about dating Korean Men? I'm attracted to K-men, but am hesitant to deal with the cultural differences, different kinds of sexism, their possible mommy-dependencies. Please write and dispel or confirm the popular myths. I'm thinking more than just getting layed, starting a possible relationship of some sort, although any insight about sex would be appreciated... |
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mindmetoo
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
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Posted: Wed Jan 24, 2007 9:07 pm Post subject: |
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Lots of women here are married to k-men and they seem to be pretty happy. There are no doubts down sides (maybe the mommy thing) but then there are upsides: family oriented, romantic, generous, nice slender bodies, good dressers, career oriented, not much hair on their ass.
Based on my own experience dating Korean women and the experience of female friends dating Korean men, at the end of the day it's a zero sum gain. And you should look at it that way. Western mates have positives and gaping negatives. Korean mates have positives and gaping negatives. You have two hands but life has dealt you only one glove. You want a glove for your left hand or your right hand? |
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periwinkle
Joined: 08 Feb 2003
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Posted: Wed Jan 24, 2007 10:06 pm Post subject: |
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You should come to the ladies' lunch on the 11th. I think ppl are unlikely to post about their experiences on this board in any detail, really. The board is just too negative, and we (ladies) haven't been posting much these days. I will bet you ten to 1 this thread ends up with Korean guys trashed by a bunch of males posters.
Anyway, I'd date a Korean guy if you are attracted to them, and not let this board influence your decision one way or the other.  |
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Demonicat

Joined: 18 Nov 2004 Location: Suwon
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Posted: Wed Jan 24, 2007 11:04 pm Post subject: |
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Don't worry, Peri, all the fellas are having a rumble in the Dating NON-Korean women thread, they won't bother y'all. Now, that said, I have never dated a Korean guy, but I have heard that they are kinda selfish in the sack. |
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Adventurer

Joined: 28 Jan 2006
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Posted: Wed Jan 24, 2007 11:42 pm Post subject: Re: Dating Korean Men |
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jessie-b wrote: |
Do any of the ladies have any positive or negative stories about dating Korean Men? I'm attracted to K-men, but am hesitant to deal with the cultural differences, different kinds of sexism, their possible mommy-dependencies. Please write and dispel or confirm the popular myths. I'm thinking more than just getting layed, starting a possible relationship of some sort, although any insight about sex would be appreciated... |
I am a foreign male. I know someone dating a Korean male and she really loves the fellow. Remember, Korean men often expect Western women to be different. That can be positive in some ways. You should find someone who has enough broken English for you to communicate and has a certain body language or psychology that helps you connect. So, it depends on the guy. I would date a Korean girl but I would want someone who understand enough English to figure me out and I don't mean being fluent. |
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periwinkle
Joined: 08 Feb 2003
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 12:06 am Post subject: |
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Demonicat wrote: |
Don't worry, Peri, all the fellas are having a rumble in the Dating NON-Korean women thread, they won't bother y'all. Now, that said, I have never dated a Korean guy, but I have heard that they are kinda selfish in the sack. |
Yeah, I've vowed to stay off those threads. I'd like to maintain my healthy blood pressure.  |
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JongnoGuru

Joined: 25 May 2004 Location: peeing on your doorstep
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 12:14 am Post subject: |
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periwinkle wrote: |
You should come to the ladies' lunch on the 11th. I think ppl are unlikely to post about their experiences on this board in any detail, really. |
Killjoy.
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I will bet you ten to 1 this thread ends up with Korean guys trashed by a bunch of males posters. |
Or, those Western male posters might just as easily trash a Western female poster -- and call her a "racist" -- for posting about a bad relationship with a Korean male. Just as they did the such last time. |
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KOREAN_MAN
Joined: 01 Oct 2006
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 12:26 am Post subject: |
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mindmetoo wrote: |
not much hair on their ass. |
Now, wouldn't that be nice.  |
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Ryst Helmut

Joined: 26 Apr 2003 Location: In search of the elusive signature...
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 12:32 am Post subject: |
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KOREAN_MAN wrote: |
mindmetoo wrote: |
not much hair on their ass. |
Now, wouldn't that be nice.  |
No, then my wife wouldn't have the joy of shaving her initials, images, words, et cetera on my bum.
!Shoosh,
Ryst |
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periwinkle
Joined: 08 Feb 2003
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 12:38 am Post subject: |
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JongnoGuru wrote: |
periwinkle wrote: |
You should come to the ladies' lunch on the 11th. I think ppl are unlikely to post about their experiences on this board in any detail, really. |
Killjoy.
Quote: |
I will bet you ten to 1 this thread ends up with Korean guys trashed by a bunch of males posters. |
Or, those Western male posters might just as easily trash a Western female poster -- and call her a "racist" -- for posting about a bad relationship with a Korean male. Just as they did the such last time. |
Usually the board is pretty predictable! That turn of events was quite surprising- I felt sorry for the OP of that thread. She didn't deserve that. Anyway, that's further testimony that females posters are fairly unlikely to post about their own experiences, eh?  |
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hellofaniceguy

Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: On your computer screen!
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 1:03 am Post subject: |
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I think if a western woman marries a korean male....and they leave korea....chances are good she'll be happily married...remain in korea...and she'll resent the marriage. Korean males are followers....not leaders and they usually fall back into the "stereotyped" role of what is "expected" of males in korea; abuse, prostitutes, alcohol abuse, etc...
just look around at the married korean women who are unhappy. Most are unhappy.
I know myself that when I am hanging out with my korean male friends, they act differently, when they get with other korean guys, all hell breaks loose it seems.
This is not being rasist on my part, just the facts. |
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JongnoGuru

Joined: 25 May 2004 Location: peeing on your doorstep
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 1:29 am Post subject: |
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periwinkle wrote: |
Usually the board is pretty predictable! That turn of events was quite surprising- I felt sorry for the OP of that thread. She didn't deserve that. |
I agree with everything you said here. It was certainly one of the weirdest things I've seen on this board.
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Anyway, that's further testimony that females posters are fairly unlikely to post about their own experiences, eh?  |
Awww c'mon ~~ Please tell us about your husband's mommy dependency, mommy fixation, etc., and how that manifests itself in the bedroom. |
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jaganath69

Joined: 17 Jul 2003
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 2:20 am Post subject: |
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OP, you go for it, be careful, but I sure as hell wouldn't be asking for advice here in the cuckoo's nest. |
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crazylemongirl

Joined: 23 Mar 2003 Location: almost there...
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 2:33 am Post subject: |
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Despite the common wisdom around here, that western women are sitting alone fat and lonely in their apartment, or in some horrible relationship with a Korean man who beats her and then runs off to the local brothel, there are lots of women around Daves that have married korean men and are living happily ever after. Some of them stay in Korea, some of them don't. As peri, said some of the sexism on the board might drive a few responses away, so you might be best off going to the ladies lunch for more of the inside scoop.
Anyway I've been here almost 4 years and this is based on my experiences:
Good
Those beautiful dark eyes.
Lots of presents.
Really seems to look out for you (ie. make sure you get home ok) sends you text messages during the day.
Not afraid to shower you with affection. Sometimes a bit corny for a cynic like me, but nice all the same.
Will show you a different side of Korea that isn't in the guidebooks. Cool little hangouts etc.
Bad
'Who are you?' Disappear for months on end. No goodbye phone, call, email, text. Then show up and act as if nothing happened.
Ugly
Hello Mr Stalker Man. You may call 100 texts/calls a day romantic, I call it stalking.
In the end, dating Korean men is just like dating men. Some of them are good, some bad, and some a little crazy. However you'll never know until you have a go. At best you might find someone to spend the rest of your life with, and at worst, you might get your heart broken. But that's just life in general huh? |
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Junior

Joined: 18 Nov 2005 Location: the eye
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 2:39 am Post subject: |
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I've known 3 western women married to K-men. They seemed happy. They had one thing in common: their men were not the typical macho soju-swilling Korean ajosshis. They were more sensitive and quiet. maybe thats the type to aim for? |
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