Site Search:
 
Speak Korean Now!
Teach English Abroad and Get Paid to see the World!
Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index Korean Job Discussion Forums
"The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
 
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister 
 ProfileProfile   Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Log inLog in 

What is special about YOU?
Goto page 1, 2, 3, 4  Next
 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index -> Off-Topic Forum
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
squat toilet



Joined: 08 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 4:03 pm    Post subject: What is special about YOU? Reply with quote

Here's what makes me especially special:

- I'm double jointed in every finger
- I've seen "Back to the Future" 28 times
- I can orgasm in less than 5 seconds. I know, hard to believe but i've done it! On more than one occasion i've wrapped things up in 3 pumps or less. That's efficiency!
- I am not Mexican


Get in line ladies
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
ceesgetdegrees



Joined: 12 Jul 2007

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 4:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I sung "i will survive" with 12 different bar bands over a 3 week vacation in thailand.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Richard Krainium



Joined: 12 Jan 2006

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 4:45 pm    Post subject: Re: What is special about YOU? Reply with quote

squat toilet wrote:
Here's what makes me especially special:

- I can orgasm in less than 5 seconds. I know, hard to believe but i've done it! On more than one occasion i've wrapped things up in 3 pumps or less. That's efficiency!
Get in line ladies

No, that's not efficiency, that's called premature ejaculation and I don't believe the ladies will be getting in line for that.

Quote:
- I am not Mexican

No, but you are an idiot.

What makes me special? I know the difference between the "General Discussions" Forum and the "Off-Topic" Forum.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
squat toilet



Joined: 08 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:12 pm    Post subject: Re: What is special about YOU? Reply with quote

Richard Krainium wrote:
squat toilet wrote:
Here's what makes me especially special:

- I can orgasm in less than 5 seconds. I know, hard to believe but i've done it! On more than one occasion i've wrapped things up in 3 pumps or less. That's efficiency!
Get in line ladies

No, that's not efficiency, that's called premature ejaculation and I don't believe the ladies will be getting in line for that.


Gee, thanks for the clarification Mr. English Teacher. How about a quick definition of "Rectal Prolapse" too. I have a feeling you are WELL versed on that particular subject sweetpea.

Quote:
No, but you are an idiot.


Oh ya, another thing that makes me special: I'm not a humorless, painfully obvious, half-witted pole smoker like Senior Dick Head here (brilliant double entendre by the way. I guess Hugh G. Rection and Ben Dover were already taken huh? Shame)
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Richard Krainium



Joined: 12 Jan 2006

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
-I'm not a Mexican

-I'm not a humorless, painfully obvious, half-witted pole smoker


Glad you think so highly of yourself squat toilet.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
pidgin



Joined: 31 Jul 2005
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I killed a man with my bare hands.


Two actually. Cool
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
RACETRAITOR



Joined: 24 Oct 2005
Location: Seoul, South Korea

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My mom says I'm special.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
sjrm



Joined: 27 Jul 2005

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i can go from 0 to 60 in like never
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Atavistic



Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:37 pm    Post subject: Re: What is special about YOU? Reply with quote

squat toilet wrote:

- I can orgasm in less than 5 seconds. I know, hard to believe but i've done it! On more than one occasion i've wrapped things up in 3 pumps or less. That's efficiency!


Wow. That's something to be proud of.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Dan The Chainsawman



Joined: 05 May 2005

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 7:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My phallus burns when I piss.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger
squat toilet



Joined: 08 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 8:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Richard Krainium wrote:

Glad you think so highly of yourself squat toilet.


Interesting coming from a guy who spends his free time trundling around Dongdemoon in one-size-fits-all mesh k-way pullovers and rummaging through the discount v-neck sweater discount bins while sweat beads up on your pasty jello jiggler face like the leaky glands on the warty ass of a Cane Toad in North Croydon.

When the 20 something sales girl greets you, your terror stricken limbs seize-up as you nervously try to decide whether to deep bow or bust out your survival Korean. Impossible to think that quickly on the fly (since afterall this is a REAL girl) you trip over your Velcro RocketDogs, land square on your ass and crap your pants. The audible "Prrrrrrrrrpt" as the shat explodes in your dumpy, off-white jockeys makes the onlooking, horrified Koreans flee for cover.

After somehow making it back to your 5 pyung apartment and removing most of the caked-on sh*t from your Humpty Dumpty Rippled ass (you'd really need a power washer to do a thorough job in reaching the dark recesses of your crevassed, pock marked dumper) you decide to fire-up the old 'puter and check out Dave's.

To your amazement you see a thread where a guy actually says disparaging things about himself instead of just randomly hurling insults at others. Impossible! You think to yourself "Maybe he's just joking around about busting a nut in 5 seconds, but I really can't be sure. Since i'm so socially retarded I think I'll play it safe and make fun of him in a painfully obvious, vomit inducing dry way in order to make myself feel better and hide the shame of my own erectile difficulties. Wait, I know, I'll top it off with my piece du resistance! Yes, i'll use my sharp wit and call him a nasty name...I got it! I'll call him an idiot!!! Yes, YEEEESSSSSS. Hahahaa...
Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrpt...Oh no, not again."
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
squat toilet



Joined: 08 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 9:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh ya, that's another thing that makes me special; I only need to read a few moronic words from some random jerk off to know every minute detail about him. I'm blessed that way.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
indytrucks



Joined: 09 Apr 2003
Location: The Shelf

PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2007 9:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

squat toilet wrote:
I'm blessed that way.


You're special, all right.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Richard Krainium



Joined: 12 Jan 2006

PostPosted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 12:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

squat toilet wrote:
Richard Krainium wrote:

Glad you think so highly of yourself squat toilet.


Interesting coming from a guy who spends his free time trundling around Dongdemoon in one-size-fits-all mesh k-way pullovers and rummaging through the discount v-neck sweater discount bins while sweat beads up on your pasty jello jiggler face......Oh no, not again."

Damn, you described me to a T! So then, can I count on seeing you in Dongdaemun again next weekend?
Quote:
How about a quick definition of "Rectal Prolapse"...

There are three chief conditions which come under the title of rectal prolapse. What exactly are your symptoms and then maybe I can tell you which definition you are looking for? I tend to think it may be a case of A2M rectal prolapse. That is, your arsehole is protruding from your mouth.
Quote:
Oh ya, that's another thing that makes me special; I only need to read a few moronic words from some random jerk off to know every minute detail about him. I'm blessed that way.

For some reason I don't think Triumph the Insult Dog is too worried. In other words, don't quit your day job abusing the kiddies at the hogwon.

And finally squattie, I would have never taken issue with your magnificent wit if this thread hadn't been originally posted in the "General Discussion" Forum.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
riley



Joined: 08 Feb 2003
Location: where creditors can find me

PostPosted: Tue Aug 14, 2007 2:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm special because I'm not wrapped up in an argument on an internet forum with a fellow lifer stuck in Korea.

See above for clarification.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    Korean Job Discussion Forums Forum Index -> Off-Topic Forum All times are GMT - 8 Hours
Goto page 1, 2, 3, 4  Next
Page 1 of 4

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


This page is maintained by the one and only Dave Sperling.
Contact Dave's ESL Cafe
Copyright © 2018 Dave Sperling. All Rights Reserved.

Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2002 phpBB Group

TEFL International Supports Dave's ESL Cafe
TEFL Courses, TESOL Course, English Teaching Jobs - TEFL International