Bob S.
Joined: 29 Apr 2004
Posts: 1767
Location: So. Cal
|
 Posted: Mon Sep 08, 2008 10:09 am Post subject: Re: Does it make sense? |
 |
|
| Swim4life wrote: |
Hi there,
I coined a motivational quote about how to relax and avoid stress:
I believe that the mark of a successful man is one that has spent an entire day in Starbucks without feeling guilty about it.
Please let me know if it sounds okay and makes sense. |
There is a minor grammatical issue that makes it kind of "iffy", but it still makes sense.
What is the grammar mistake?
In your direct object phrase "the mark of a successful man is one that has spent...", the core sentence is "the mark is one...". One is a predicate nominative that should refer back to your subject mark. But in this case, it doesn't. It clearly refers back to man, the object of an adjective prepositional phrase of a successful man. It is a common grammatical mistake, but we can still understand just what you mean. It was a good effort!
Can it be fixed? Sure! Switch around one and that so that it reads:
I believe that the mark of a successful man is that one has spent an entire day in Starbucks without feeling guilty about it.
Now that is your predicate nominative for your subject mark and it is all balanced. |
|
FAQ
Search
Memberlist
Usergroups
Register
Profile
Log in to check your private messages
Log in
