Dave's ESL Cafe's Student Discussion Forums

shadowman · Joined: 29 Aug 2004 Posts: 15

Hi all

this a new one hopfully you like it Embarassed

let you with it Wink

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cellphone
on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free speaker-function
and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

MAN: " Hello"

Woman: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"

Man: "Yes"

Woman: "I am at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat.
It's only $1000. Is it OK if I buy it?"

Man:"Sure, go ahead if you like it that much."

Woman: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new models. There was one I would really like to have."

Man:"How much?"

Woman: "$60,000"

Man:? "OK, but for that price make sure you get all the options."

Woman:?? "Great! Oh and one more thing.....The house we wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking $950,000."

Man: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer, but just offer 900,000".

Woman:?? "OK. I'll see you later! I love you!"

Man: "Bye, I love you, too!"

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are looking at him in astonishment.

Then he asks "Does anyone know who this cellphone belongs to?"
_________________
Don't walk in front of me I may not follow
Don't walk behind me I may not lead
Walk beside me and just be my friend

RedRose · Joined: 21 May 2004 Posts: 2735 Location: GuangZhou, China

this man is so crazy!! Laughing

I guess this woman's husband will cry after his wife runs out of all his money! Laughing

admiral · Joined: 17 Sep 2005 Posts: 546

he must be Bill Gates
_________________
If I say "I love you" to someone, then I also have to say "I love inside you everyone else. I love the whole world because of you. I also love myself inside you"

KHF · Joined: 15 Dec 2005 Posts: 100 Location: ON, Canada

Here's another one about the so called *perfect husbands*:

A group of women went shopping. On the way they saw an interesting sign: *Potential husbands for sale!*. They immediately decided to go and see what it was all about.

A huge mall with five floors stood in front of them. At the door, a security guard told them the rules: "Once you step into the mall, you can only go up, not down. If you make a purchase or if you decide not to make a purchase, you must leave forever." The women all nodded in agreement. Off they went!

On the first floor, a huge sign summarized the characteristics of the men here: "These guys are handsome."

"That's it?" One of the women shouted in dissapointment. "Don't worry about it, we still have four more floors to look at," others comforted her.
So they all climbed to the second floor.

There was another sign: "These guys are handsome and romantic." The women were now very excited. This was getting better and better! So they all went to the third floor anxiously.

On the third floor, the sign read "These guys are handsome, romantic and rich." Some women started cheering happily. They rushed to the fourth floor without a heartbeat.

On the fourth floor, the description was "These guys are handsome, romantic and rich. They also cook and do housework." This was like a dream come true, but what would the fifth floor hold in store for them? Without second thoughts all women went to the fifth floor.

When they reached it, the place looked like a ghost town. No other customers were around in sight. The only things that remotely stood out were a small sign in the center of the vacant space and an elevator.

The women were confused. They gathered together around the sign. One woman read it out loud, "This floor is here to prove that women are simply impossible to please. If you hadn't noticed, there is no *husband* to be purchased on this floor. Please exit the mall via the elevator now. Have a nice day."