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nagano
Joined: 22 Oct 2006 Posts: 18
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Posted: Thu Oct 26, 2006 5:51 am Post subject: I would like to introduce my dream |
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Hello, teachers
I am wondering if the use of "introduce" in the following sentence is acceptable.
"I would like to introduce my dream."
This sentence is used to begin an essay titled "What I want to be in the future."
If not, please correct the sentence.
Best regards,
Nagano |
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CP
Joined: 12 Jun 2006 Posts: 2875 Location: California
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Posted: Thu Oct 26, 2006 6:41 am Post subject: |
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With that title to the essay, the reader will expect to read something about your hopes, dreams, and plans for the future. So it is good to get right to the point at the beginning.
But for me, "introduce" is not quite the right word here. I might start out with one of these:
"Everyone has a dream. This is mine: To be a diving instructor."
"I have high hopes for my future. I want to be a diving instructor."
"My fondest wish is to be a diving instructor."
"My future is clear: I will one day be a diving instructor." _________________ You live a new life for every new language you speak. -Czech proverb |
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nagano
Joined: 22 Oct 2006 Posts: 18
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Posted: Fri Oct 27, 2006 3:51 am Post subject: |
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Hi, CP-san
Thank you very much for your help.
Is it possible for you to explain why you feel "introduce" is not quite the right word here? Is it grammatical? Or is it not good to start an essy for some other reason?
Japanese students tend to use "introduce" rather often in this context, and I need to explain why it is not good.
Best regards,
Nagano |
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Jizzo T. Clown
Joined: 09 Jan 2006 Posts: 5
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Posted: Fri Oct 27, 2006 6:10 am Post subject: |
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Nagano--
We already know what you'd like to do based on the title of your paper. Therefore you do not need to tell us again. Just begin by saying what your dream is.
ALWAYS consider your audience when writing an essay! |
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nagano
Joined: 22 Oct 2006 Posts: 18
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Posted: Sat Oct 28, 2006 3:03 am Post subject: |
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Hi, Jizzo T. Clown,
Now I understand. Thank you very much.
Best regards,
Nagano |
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