Job Discussion Forums

[organix]

I have a former student from last year who recently asked me to fill in TEN evaluation forms for her applications to American universities. I was unable to make a lunch date so she dropped off a huge package on my desk with instructions for completing the evaluations. I haven't seen her in months. I would have no problem if it was just one form, but each form is several pages long and requires answering a series of questions. This would take hours and hours of work.

This girl is brilliant and I have no doubt she will make it into one of her chosen universities, but it just seems unreasonable to ask this of me. She is a "special" student who mainly works at home on her own. She does not attend classes with the rest of her "classmates". While she frequently came to my office to chat and use my desk to study for the SATs, she actually only sat in on ONE of my lessons. As such I feel it is unfair to put me in this position of evaluation. Now I know she is brilliant, but is this reasonable?

Her father is the secretary of the CCP for a small city in Guangdong and they once treated me to dinner and gave me a few small gifts mainly some art books, perhaps as a precursor to this request. I've already written her a letter of recommendation for a summer camp in America (to which she was accepted)

But what do you think I should do about this request?

Thanks.

[NathanRahl]

This girl is a user, I have seen it a million times before, brush her off and have no further contact with her, she only feigns friendship because you serve a purpose, nothing more.

[laska]

If she is really special, it would be best to bite the bullet and fill out the recs for her. Are you sure it would take hours? Can you write one standard rec letter to use for all ten forms? Others please correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that's what is usually done in this type of situation. I understand you'll have to fill in the bubbles individually on the forms, no getting around that.

By helping her you'll be helping along a brilliant student towards a bright future. If you stay in touch with her, you'll have a friend for life. And she will ceftainly be in a position to return the favor someday.

[Tessio]

I agree with Nathan, but if you like the girl and want to help, go ahead and fill out the forms.

2 former students of mine are now in the UK and Australia. I'm going to work on a 3rd recommendation letter today. But, I don't think this one will be accepted.

I'm here for the people.

[NathanRahl]

I disagree with laska,

The girl has to hands and working opposable thumbs I am assuming?

If you give her what she wants, she will just wontinue under the dilusion that being special gives her some exalted position in society, and that she can and likely should get more consideration and help then others. This is of course BS, better she find it out now then later, that she's no better then anyone else, and if she doesn't learn to pull her own weight, she's gonna have a hard time in life. Take care.

[dajiang]

Absolutely with Nathan on this one.

She's a student right? and a brilliant one at that. So it should really be no problem for her to do this little thing for her own sake.

And just to drop a whole stack of it on your desk is really too much. It's the way to ask and say please eh. So nah, dont bother. say youre busy with work, and you could show her how to do one for instance (let her fill it in), but that's it.

Teaching someone self-responsibility, politeness, and what's acceptable to ask of someone, is just as important as teaching someone English.

Dajiang

[william wallace]

nil

[Tessio]

I guess I'm alone, again.

Help.

Republican Paul.

So much for the Democrats out there.

[cj750]

this form seems to me to be a great bargaining chip....

[Shan-Shan]

[laska]

She's applying to U.S. universities I assume?

These recommendation forms are just standard parts of the applications that each school uses. Filling them out is just part of what teachers do. When I was an American high school student, one of my teachers filled them out for me. And I never even took him out to lunch. The small gifts and dinner dates may seem manipulative if you're fed up with China and disposed to react negatively to things Chinese. But you can also see it as a nice way of thanking someone for something that they kind of ought to do anyway. And besides, meals are absolutely required thanks in the Chinese culture and signs of politeness here. Now, would I be annoyed if I had to fill a ton of these things out? Well, sure. Anyone would be.

Applying to 10 universities may sound excessive, but a lot of advisors will recommend you apply to up to 10, then go with whomever gives you the most money. This sounds like good advice, especialy for foreign studs who can't count on government loans and financial aid.

[Shan-Shan]

[DistantRelative]

As usual I disagree with Nathan. Only been here a few months and he's seen it a million times.

IMO it's simple really. What's being asked is outside the scope of your normal contracted duties. I would explain that to her, and then go on to explain how much time you estimate it will take you to do it and how much you think that time is worth to you, shoot her a price and go from there.

Time is money!

Zhu hao,

Shawn

[erinyes]

tell her to come to your office and fill them out while you do your lesson plans. then if she has any questions you are there to help her. She does it, you help.

[vikdk]