Korean Job Discussion Forums

sweetonsno · Joined: 26 Oct 2006 Location: Munjeong-dong

So, from what I've read, everyone goes through a time, five to seven months after they arrive, where they get homesick. I just hit that point myself and generally hate everything about my current situation. I won't go into details, but it's less that I miss my home and more that I feel like here is not a place that I want to be.

I like the food okay, and other than the hacking and other noises, I don't find anything particularly offensive about Koreans. I guess what bothers me the most is the social situation. It feels kind of like everyone thinks they're on extended spring break and it's difficult to find meaningful, lasting relationships (platonic or otherwise).

Since I don't *really* want to cut 'n' run, I'm stuck in it. What did you do when you hit that bad point? Any tips for riding it out? (Or making it go away...) How did you deal with negative feelings when they came up?

Thank you. And happy March!

djsmnc · Joined: 20 Jan 2003 Location: Dave's ESL Cafe

I'd say get some Chia Balls and grow a pair!

ella · Joined: 17 Apr 2006

huffdaddy · Joined: 25 Nov 2005

nautilus · Joined: 26 Nov 2005 Location: Je jump, Tu jump, oui jump!

Korea always offers the "things will get so much better" probability, but never quite delivers.

Vancouver · Joined: 12 Dec 2006

make some friends

EFLtrainer · Joined: 04 May 2005

Make some Korean friends.

VanIslander · Posted: Sat Mar 03, 2007 10:59 am Post subject:

Hump? Hating where you are because of homesickness after six months?

I think that's more of a factor for those who have never lived on their own before.There are tons of twentysomethings here.

kangnam mafioso · Joined: 27 Jan 2003 Location: Teheranno

i sort of liked that "spring break" attitude in korea. most of the foreigners you meet are a little off kilter, although this can keep things interesting. back home everyone is too normal and predictable, paying a mortgage and doing the same old things. after you've been in town for a while you will meet more long-term expats but that doesn't mean they will be "normal." haha ... enjoy

JongnoGuru · Joined: 25 May 2004 Location: peeing on your doorstep

oneofthesarahs · Joined: 05 Nov 2006 Location: Sacheon City

I'm sort of surprised by how many people have this "HOMESICKNESS? BAH!! GROW A PAIR!!" attitude.

It's perfectly normal to feel homesick if you live in another country in a completely new environment, regardless of how old you are or if you've ever lived on your own before. Everything is different: the people, the language, the food, the attitudes.

I want this to be known loud and clear: Feeling homesick, vulnerable, or lonely does not make you a bad person. It does not make you a weak person. What it means is that you are a human being.

The problem comes when you can't move on from the lonliness and homesickness. Let yourself be homesick and sad, it's normal. But then pull yourself up by your bootstraps and try to be proactive in changing things. Find a new hobby, make new friends, maybe even try to get to know your coworkers (they might be cooler than you think). And most off all, don't ever let the bastards get you down.

wylies99 · Joined: 13 May 2006 Location: I'm one cool cat!

You can get homesick at any age. Things must have been MUCH rougher here before the internet was so widely available. Talk about being cut off from the world. Rolling Eyes

My advice? Change your routine.
If you are leaving at the end of the 12 months, start preparing for home. Look for some GOOD souvenirs (no more bookmarks Laughing

). Maybe join a gym to look slimmer when you get off the plane.

If you plan to stay, and you're homesick, maybe you need to reconsider staying past 12 months. Korea probably won't get any better, and it sure won't get any "newer."

I don't think you'll find the solution in meeting other people. Many of them can be just as homesick as you. Many of the people who've been here a long time don't help others very much. They live in their own world and consider those of us who've been here under a year to be wastes of time. Believe me- I know this from personal experience. Many just don't like to help others.

Qinella · Joined: 25 Feb 2005 Location: the crib

Bathroom reading:

http://www.worldwide.edu/travel_planner/culture_shock.html

wylies99 · Joined: 13 May 2006 Location: I'm one cool cat!

dmbfan · Joined: 09 Mar 2006

O.P., pay no attention to the E.S.L armchair generals, who think you should grow a pair. I am willing to bet that those who make comments like that don't have a pair themselves........

Now, look at it this way. You have been here long enough to realize that you have something to work for. You are past the six month mark, right? You are half way there! You've swam half way across the lake..........hang in there.

Things you can do:

1. Gym
2. Get into the job itself. Do some self studying. Better yourself as a
teacher.
3. Read as many books as you can.

You get the picture, I assume?

This is a normal phase. When you reach that 8-10 month mark, things will probably change. The end will be more in sight, and may start to feel more motivated..........or more apathetic, because YOU WILL BE FINISHED SOON.

Don't worry, unless there is trouble at school, try to hang in there. If you can't, there is NO SHAME in that. There is a reason why people really don't come to Korea to visit.

Best of luck!

Cheers.

dmbfan