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getting over an impossible lover...
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shapeshifter



Joined: 29 Nov 2005
Location: Paris

PostPosted: Fri Aug 14, 2009 9:25 am    Post subject: Re: getting over an impossible lover... Reply with quote

the boy next door wrote:
i'm really putting in a lot of time here trying to get over a friend who turned into a lover then just a friend again. Sad

she's a little younger than me and Korean making it all that more difficult. anyway, any advice, please, to ease my wonderment and sense of loss? Crying or Very sad



Why is that so many obviously middle-aged men feel the need to include the word 'boy' in their handle? No young person ever does that.
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earthbound14



Joined: 23 Jan 2007
Location: seoul

PostPosted: Fri Aug 14, 2009 11:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Get another girl, take the moment of freedom to do something no girlfriend would let you do, bury yourself in sport or art.
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hellakitty



Joined: 15 Sep 2007
Location: Variable

PostPosted: Sat Aug 15, 2009 8:11 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Whether this a troll or not I feel compelled to reply. Over the past couple of years I have been struggling with a relationship that cannot be - the distance is too great and neither of us is sure enough of and/or willing to just give up everything and relocate. We are not together and I have even dated other people, but the simplest thing sends me back there.

Time is the only thing in my case that offers any relief. Once you have accepted and are willing to let go of the dream of the relationship, the best thing you can do is give yourself plenty of time and space. Even though we are across oceans I visited him recently (BIG mistake) and I am now feeling like I am not even able to date for the foreseeable future. Don't be friends until you feel like friends - this could be days, months, years.

Stay positive and fill your time with meaningful activities and physical activities as others have suggested. whether it be work, school, or some other goal. Best of luck, OP.
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