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When is it serious?
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stumptown



Joined: 11 Apr 2005
Location: Paju: Wife beating capital of Korea

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 5:25 am    Post subject: When is it serious? Reply with quote

I've never posted things about my relationships (or lack of) here. But, I'm starting to feel wierd about my current relationship. I met a K-girl awhile back and we've gotten really close. Last week I met her and her brother for dinner, then later I partied with her brother without her. Now, this weekend I'm meeting her, her brothers, and her (divorced and remarried) mother. She comes across as not serious about a relationship (i.e. marriage) but we spend almost everyday together. Now that I'm getting close to the family, does that mean that something is expected to happen at some point in the future? In the past, girls I dated never intorduced me to their family, but now this is snowballing. Not the same 'snowballing' as in Clerks, but you know. Current husbands of Kgirls, let me know. Thanks
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Captain Corea



Joined: 28 Feb 2005
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 5:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yup, sounds like it is getting serious.


Are you prepared if it is?
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Kimchieluver



Joined: 02 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 5:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

If you are meeting her family it is serious. Be prepared to ask the question and if not be prepared to tell her no.
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Bulsajo



Joined: 16 Jan 2003

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 5:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think that in Korea- no matter how worldly the girl might seem, no matter how many times she says she's not really looking for a serious relationship- if you're meeting the family then it's serious.
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stumptown



Joined: 11 Apr 2005
Location: Paju: Wife beating capital of Korea

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 5:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah. From the second meeting on, I had that "feeling". Like, uh-oh, my single days are over. The thing is, I've never been serious about life and suddenly I feel like...it's time to be an adult and take on some responsibilities. But with this girl, I would walk through Hell and back.
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Kimchieluver



Joined: 02 Mar 2005

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 5:58 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Then you have found the right girl... now just call her a woman.
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stumptown



Joined: 11 Apr 2005
Location: Paju: Wife beating capital of Korea

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 6:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kimchieluver wrote:
Then you have found the right girl... now just call her a woman.


Yeah, OK. She's ten years younger. (I'm 35) So it's hard to think of her as a woman. But...I've always heard of people saying "you know it when you see it", so I'm really confused right now. It's like I can't think straight and when I see her it's like seeing a double rainbow on a cloudy day. Or hearing a really great Elliot Smith (RIP) song.
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rapier



Joined: 16 Feb 2003

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 6:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Make a decision one way or the other, she's obviously expecting one. Sounds like it will be a "yes", good luck.
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tzechuk



Joined: 20 Dec 2004

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 7:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Follow your heart. Don't listen to your brain - that's where the confusion begins.

If your heart says *yes*, go for it. Otherwise, break up with her before it's too late.
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chiaa



Joined: 23 Aug 2003

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 7:21 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I met the mother, damn serious.

I met the father, it was for him to give his ok for the plunge.

Good luck man.
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spidey112233



Joined: 21 Jul 2005

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 8:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

stumptown wrote:
Kimchieluver wrote:
Then you have found the right girl... now just call her a woman.


Yeah, OK. She's ten years younger. (I'm 35) So it's hard to think of her as a woman. But...I've always heard of people saying "you know it when you see it", so I'm really confused right now. It's like I can't think straight and when I see her it's like seeing a double rainbow on a cloudy day. Or hearing a really great Elliot Smith (RIP) song.


haha!! "So it's hard to think of her as a woman"

^^^ that was funny!! Laughing
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mercury



Joined: 05 Dec 2004
Location: Pusan

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 9:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow! Marry her right away! That is what I would do! I mean, sure, when people first meet the neurons are really pumping out the chemicals, I know how you feel, it is always the same way whenever people start dating. But remember..........................

after marriage the chemicals wear off REALLY FAST!

That is just human nature. It is called Habitation.

Just like eating at your favorite restaurant every day, again, and again.

So marry her FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASt, and then when she begins to put on weight, and in her thirties her face turns round like a moon, and she starts yelling at you, and then your kids are all running around the house..........you can have memories of the great honeymoon in Cheju Island Cool
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Homer
Guest




PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 9:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

When I met the mother I knew it was moving towards marriage. When I met the father the deal was sealed.

It's a normal step in a serious relationship.
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bucheon bum



Joined: 16 Jan 2003

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 11:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kimchieluver wrote:
If you are meeting her family it is serious. Be prepared to ask the question and if not be prepared to tell her no.


Depends on the meeting circumstances, which, in this case, seem to indicate that yes, it is serious.
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taegu girl



Joined: 20 Apr 2004
Location: California

PostPosted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 12:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

hi! Yes, meeting the parents is pretty serious. All my Korean girl friends warned me about not meeting any guy's parents unless i was serious about the relationship. However, it does not mean you have to get married right away/soon after meeting them. I met my mother in law 2 years before my husband (Korean) and i got married. I officially met my father in law 4 weeks before we got married. We had seen each other before this but not really talked at all- i think he was waiting for his son to give up dating me. But, if it feels right and you are ready for the committment, go for it. best of luck Smile
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