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Zyzyfer

Joined: 29 Jan 2003 Location: who, what, where, when, why, how?
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Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2005 5:23 am Post subject: |
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I thought I was antisocial until I read this thread.  |
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guangho

Joined: 19 Jan 2005 Location: a spot full of deception, stupidity, and public micturation and thus unfit for longterm residency
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Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2005 6:21 am Post subject: |
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| I had an acquiantance once who was constantly pestering me to go to religious studies with him. I told my folks that it felt like he only hung out with me to get me into his program. They agreed and thought that such a relationship- where one person befriends another soley for personal gain- was perfectly normal. That is how most define friendship- something for something. |
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pollyplummer

Joined: 07 Mar 2005 Location: McMinnvillve, Oregon
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Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2005 9:10 am Post subject: friendies |
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Friends... I love the tv show. That might mean I'm a dum-dum, but I'm prepared to accept it. I think that it's a good idea to choose your close friends carefully. If you feel like someone is always taking and sucking the life out of you, then find some new friends. It doesn't matter how people in general define friends or friendship, because in the end you still choose your friends. I'd trade most of my friends for solitude, a book, and a blanket on rainy days. There are very few who feel like a second self to me- maybe two or three friends and my youngest sister. What drives me nuts about my friends is that many of them suck at correspondance and most of them are scattered all over the world.  |
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fusionbarnone
Joined: 31 May 2004
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Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2005 1:35 pm Post subject: |
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Friends can be either expensive or, a bonus.
Look at Korean "friendships", these are weighed up carefully. Not slagging Koreans it's just people generally have to be careful in who they designate as, "friends".
Once, we almost got jailed in one country for not possessing an on-going ticket and 20 minutes to do something. A quick call to a travel agent friend and we came in under the 20 minutes.
The jewish people have a saying" No reciprocation, no friendship". I think that sums it up. |
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Hater Depot
Joined: 29 Mar 2005
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Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2005 1:40 pm Post subject: |
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| We do? |
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numazawa

Joined: 20 Mar 2005 Location: The Concrete Barnyard
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Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2005 3:13 pm Post subject: |
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| EFLtrainer wrote: |
Friends are Fiends Forever
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Is that your way of saying they will all burn in hell?  |
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EFLtrainer

Joined: 04 May 2005
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Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2005 11:49 am Post subject: |
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| numazawa wrote: |
| EFLtrainer wrote: |
Friends are Fiends Forever
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Is that your way of saying they will all burn in hell?  |
Aiiiiigoooooo!!!! ....if I only was a typist.... (think yellow brick road)
But what do you mean "they?"  |
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Wrench
Joined: 07 Apr 2005
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Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2005 3:11 pm Post subject: |
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Surprised that some of you haven't committed murder.
I have only a small handful of good friends the rest are acquaintances. |
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kermo

Joined: 01 Sep 2004 Location: Eating eggs, with a comb, out of a shoe.
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Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2005 5:31 pm Post subject: |
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The 1st Law of Friendship (according to the philosopher Kermo) is this:
A friend is someone who makes a good thing better. |
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EFLtrainer

Joined: 04 May 2005
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Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2005 8:08 pm Post subject: |
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| kermo wrote: |
The 1st Law of Friendship (according to the philosopher Kermo) is this:
A friend is someone who makes a good thing better. |
A little broad, no?
A: I'll have the Porterhouse, please.
B: Sir, may I suggest the Leg of Lamb. It's *exquisite* today.
A: Why, yes! Thank you! You just made my dinner better! Will you be my new friend?
OR
M: Hi. May I buy you a drink?
W: No, thank you. I'm not here to meet anyone. But, thanks.
M: I'm sorry, I don't mean to intrude, but I still would like to buy you a drink. No strings. I'm just killing time myself...
W: Well... sure.
Time passes. Laughs ensue. A good time is had by all...
W: Good night, and thank you for a nice evening.
M: No, no. My pleasure. Could I give you a call sometime?
W: Well, I'm not available, but since you brightened my evening we are now friends and must add each other to our Christmas card lists, Rolodexes and family portraits immediately.
M: Wonderful! I'll call you soon, then!
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kermo

Joined: 01 Sep 2004 Location: Eating eggs, with a comb, out of a shoe.
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Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2005 8:25 pm Post subject: |
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True, true, it's all true. By my definition, you could actually make friends with your leg of lamb.
Still, it's a deliberately loose definition. I have a Finnish friend who says he has only one "friend" in the world, though he is well-liked and fairly sociable. He reserves the term for someone he can depend upon to the ends of the earth. I'm not nearly as picky.
Here's a revised version:
A friend is someone you enjoy sharing experiences with.
This actually includes negative experiences, since our more significant friendships involve mutual support as well as enjoyment. The grammar implies that the sharing is ongoing, but there are no requirements for permanence.
I don't like the idea that a friendship is a transaction. It's valid, but rather unpaletteable. In any case, there's life beyond capitalism. |
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EFLtrainer

Joined: 04 May 2005
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Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2005 8:42 pm Post subject: |
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| kermo wrote: |
| True, true, it's all true. By my definition, you could actually make friends with your leg of lamb. |
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desultude

Joined: 15 Jan 2003 Location: Dangling my toes in the Persian Gulf
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Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2005 8:43 pm Post subject: |
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I have a few good friends, and one "best friend".
He is a gay Cuban American Dadaist poet, and sometimes our friendship is surreal. We have really different temperments (he is tempestuous and emotional- you know- gay and Cuban ) and different interests, but we understand each other pretty well.
My mark of someone being my really true friend- there is absolutely nothing we could not ask of each other that we wouldn't give each other. |
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EFLtrainer

Joined: 04 May 2005
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Posted: Fri Oct 28, 2005 1:59 pm Post subject: |
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| desultude wrote: |
| My mark of someone being my really true friend- there is absolutely nothing we could not ask of each other that we wouldn't give each other. |
And that, my lucky poster, is a king's ransom. And then some.
Of course, being that kind of friend is a challenge few of us succeed in... ...so I guess it is not much of a surprise that they are few and far between. I've almost had one, but never been asked to be one. Don't think that is a good sign.  |
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desultude

Joined: 15 Jan 2003 Location: Dangling my toes in the Persian Gulf
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Posted: Fri Oct 28, 2005 3:51 pm Post subject: |
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| EFLtrainer wrote: |
| desultude wrote: |
| My mark of someone being my really true friend- there is absolutely nothing we could not ask of each other that we wouldn't give each other. |
And that, my lucky poster, is a king's ransom. And then some.
Of course, being that kind of friend is a challenge few of us succeed in... ...so I guess it is not much of a surprise that they are few and far between. I've almost had one, but never been asked to be one. Don't think that is a good sign.  |
Of course, the other part of the equation is knowing that if he does ask for something, it is necessary and not trivial. One thing we both have in common is that we are both pretty independent and proud, and when we do ask, it is necessary.
I honestly believe I usually fall way short of what it means to be a good friend, and I have a lot of work to do in that department.  |
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